It makes sense that the holidays might look and feel different this year. Maybe we are wondering how to show up authentically when our feelings seem dismissed or not validated by some. We might wonder who closest to us has the ability to support us. It’s essential to rebalance our relationships with family and friends and learn how to align them with our current reality.
Take Your Time (and Own That Timeline Unapologetically)
We can recognize that some connections may not resonate with our needs and boundaries, and stay open to how we can coexist. We don’t have to apologize for our feelings or boundaries. Just because some people might not fully understand, that doesn’t mean we aren’t entitled to take the time we need for healing.
There is no timeline we have to follow or meet. It’s ok to protect ourselves, even when it requires some space from people or places that don’t feel good right now.
Protect Your Heart
Choosing to protect our heart might mean not having the capacity to share or educate.
- Not everyone deserves that level of vulnerability and energy from you.
- Not everyone has the emotional intelligence to fully witness and understand our feelings.
Make some decisions around how the holidays will feel best for you:
- Choose your holiday events with how they align with your capacity.
- Choose who you want to catch up with and spend time with because you can feel at ease and refuelled.
- Have an exit plan for events that might feel like too much. It’s ok to leave early.
Our heart deserves extra care and understanding, so let’s protect it.
Ask Yourself: What Makes You Feel Good?
Over the holidays we can treat ourselves as a reminder of what we deserve. We can ask ourselves if we truly want to do something or just feel obligated to. We can make room for days that uplift and nourish our spirit, and truly refuel us.
What does that look like? Who are we with? What makes us feel connected and present? What ways can we reconnect with the small pleasures that ignite creativity and passion? What new rituals can we start?
It’s a radical act of self-compassion to recognise our unique needs, and desires and give ourselves permission to choose them first. How human to have guilt sneak in when we do. Let guilt be a gentle nudge that we are choosing ourselves and that’s just not a feeling we are used to. That doesn’t make it the wrong choice. Lean into that, we have all earned it.
